I am not sure where to start tonight as my heart is real heavy. So much is burdening me today/tonight but just as much as I cry out...I hear and feel Christ holding me. It seems when I am overwhelmed someone is there to point me back to His Hand or I hear the gentle whisper, "Trust me, child!" or "I'm holding you."
I am a fix it person. If something is broken I want it fixed...I want to get it fix. So for my students to hurt and I can't do anything to "fix" them...when they tell me they can't call home because noone can come get them...HURTS me. When someone in my family hurts...I want to fix it. I want to take the pain away. When I am overwhelmed or confused...I want to fix it. I want answers then...I dont want to wait.
I found myself in this state today while "shopping" at a local store....I was just browsing looking for nothing particular when I was venting to a friend about life and it was like God whispered..."Be still my child...I am holding you. My timing is perfect. When are you going to cry out to me?" so there in the store...I quit texting my friend...and I said JEsus, fix me...I am broken. I need you. to which you know...He did. I had a peace over me and I could smile again.
Does this mean I am not hurting? Does this mean I won't struggle? Does this mean I can't vent to friends? No...it means at that moment and more...I need to cry out to him...My hurts...HE FIXES. My pain...HE HEALS. My Jesus...HE LOVES.
