You never know how much you have until It's gone.

Today/Tonight I have been doing so much analyzing it is crazy! I knew waking up today it was a different day as this day 8 years ago I almost lost one of the most important people to me, my grandmother. Mamaw passed out with a bleeding anourysm (sp?) on her brain. That night the doctors gave her a 50/50 chance to live. Mamaw doesn't remember much that night but she remembers me coming in the emergency room holding hands with her, Mom, and Papaw and me praying for her. FRom there they sent us to Memphis for Mamaw to have surgery on her brain. It was to be a coil surgery but when we got there we realized it would be straight up open brain surgery. Long story short...2 weeks to the day of us going to Memphis, Mamaw, Papaw and Mom drove home to Louisiana from Memphis. Mamaw is a walking/talking miracle today. If you were to see her today you would not know of her surgery. Mamaw...I love you. You are so special to me and I am so thankful God healed you on earth.

But also today one of my students from FCA interupted my classroom to let me know that another student's dad had passed away last night. This little girl is in 6th grade and she has two older brothers in high school then a 5 year old brother. I do not teach her but she believes alot in me as she came to me yesterday asking me to pray for her and her family. I had to look at her and say how God sometimes heals on earth and sometimes He heals by taking our loved one home. With tears in our eyes I had to enjoy my day yesterday knowing that a little girl was hurting so much and had to live her day yesterday. Today though life was completely different for her as someone she believed in so much...she has had to watch suffer and pass away.

So all day I have been thinking about how many in my life I take forgranted daily. My family live 4.5 hours away and they completely support me being in Dallas. I have lost many people in my life and they never knew how much they meant to me or how much I loved them. One thing I have realized lately that some people do not realize how much I care about them or how much I love them. I am making it my goal this year to show this more....if it is my family, my friends, my coworkers, my students, or a stranger. I don't know if mercy is that answer...but if you are reading this know that though I don't show it often or sometimes do not know how...You mean so much to me. I love you dearly and am thankful you are in my life. If God were to take you away tomorrow you will know how I feel. Consider yourself loved and hugged.

So I leave with my title...YOu never know how much you have until it's gone. I thought I was learning this that Saturday night of my senior year in 2001 but a little girl did have to learn this way too early last night.